So this blog will now mostly contain posts about horribly stupid pop culture stories. I would like to start these new posts off with the stupidest thing I've seen in a long time. Angelina Jolie putting her stupid, ugly (I mean really beautiful) leg out of her highly slit dress and standing there like a fuckin' dime store hooker at the Oscars the whole night.
What an asshole. Some people are saying this is some sort of inside joke between her and Brad Pitt. ______________ (that was the sound of crickets not laughing at the horribly unfunny inside joke) I mean, hilarious. Angie, I never knew how funny you were. You're a regular Bill Cosby. If Bill Cosby was a rail thin, white, non-funny woman who loved the look of her own face. If this wasn't a joke and was actually serious, which is what I think it was, then who the fuck do you think you are? Oh. Angelina Jolie? Shit. Good one. But still. I don't care who you are. Get over yourself.Here's the deal; I don't like and never have liked Angelina. I'm team Jennifer Aniston all the way. I mean alllll the way. Like, as far up her vagina as I could go. I bet even her vagina wears casual jeans and a belt with a simple tank and still looks amazing. Angelina, on the other hand, is an anorexic homewrecker whose face is frozen in a weird squint, pucker lips pose that only Renee Zellweger can pull off because that is what her face actually looks like.
I like a woman who has curves and loves to get down on a fucking sandwich and drink a beer. I DON'T like a woman who carries a vile of blood around her neck, sloppy seabasses her brother for attention, and whose arm looks like it belongs in a stack of dead, starved bodies in WWII.
EAT A FUCKING SANDWICH!!! And while you're at it, take all those women's husband's dicks out of your mouth.
